Una corrección real de Protu
Un ensayo real de IELTS Academic Task 2 corregido por Protu, tal como lo ve un estudiante. Toca cualquier frase resaltada para ver qué estaba mal y por qué.
AcadémicoTarea 2Seleccionar banda objetivo: 6.0-6.5Banda Prevista: 6.0
Some people believe that individuals should be responsible for reducing environmental problems, while others think that governments and large companies should take the main responsibility.
Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 words.
Versión corregida
Original Essay (Click to see corrections)
Nowadays, environmental problems such as air pollution and climate change is becoming more serious. Some people believe that each individual should be responsible for protect the environment, while others think that governments and big companies should take the main responsibility. In this essay, I will discuss both views and give my opinion.
On the one hand, individuals can make a difference in their daily life. For example, if people use public transport instead of driving, the amount of carbon emissions will reduce. Also, people can recycle their rubbish and avoid to use plastic bags. When millions of people changes their habits, the effect on the environment can be very big. In addition, when people choose eco-friendly products, companies are forced to change the way they produce goods.
On the other hand, governments and large companies have much more power and money than individuals. Governments can make laws which limits pollution from factories, and they can invest in renewable energy like solar and wind power. Big companies produce the most of the pollution, so they should be responsible for reduce it. For instance, a single factory can pollute a river more than thousands of families. However, without clear rules and strong punishment, many businesses will continue to put profit before the environment, and this is why the government role is so important.
In my opinion, governments and companies should take the main responsibility, because they can make bigger changes more quickly. However, individuals also have a role to play, and everyone should try to live in a more greener way.
In conclusion, although both individuals and organisations can help, I believe that governments and companies must lead the fight against environmental problems.
Revised Essay
Nowadays, environmental problems such as air pollution and climate change are becoming more serious. Some people believe that each individual should be responsible for protecting the environment, while others think that governments and big companies should bear primary responsibility. In this essay, I will discuss both views and give my opinion.
On the one hand, individuals can make a meaningful contribution in their everyday lives. For example, if people use public transport instead of driving, the amount of carbon emissions will be reduced. Also, people can recycle their rubbish and avoid using plastic bags. When millions of people change their habits, the effect on the environment can be very big. In addition, when people choose eco-friendly products, companies are forced to change the way they produce goods.
On the other hand, governments and large companies have much more power and money than individuals. Governments can make laws which limit pollution from factories, and they can invest in renewable energy like solar and wind power. Big companies produce most pollution, so they should be responsible for reducing it. For instance, a single factory can pollute a river more than thousands of families. However, without clear rules and strong punishment, many businesses will continue to prioritise profits over environmental protection, and this is why the government's role is so important.
In my opinion, governments and companies should take the main responsibility, because they can make bigger changes more quickly. However, individuals also have a role to play, and everyone should try to live in a greener way.
In conclusion, although both individuals and organisations can help, I believe that governments and companies must lead the fight against environmental problems.
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Overall Feedback
- The essay presents both viewpoints clearly and gives a consistent opinion.
- Examples such as public transport, recycling, renewable energy and factory pollution are relevant and effective.
- Several subject–verb, verb-form and article errors reduce grammatical accuracy; carefully check agreement and verb patterns.
- Vocabulary is generally clear but sometimes basic or unnatural; use more precise academic collocations.
- Strengthen accuracy by proofreading common structures such as “responsible for + -ing” and “avoid + -ing”.
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